When it's over it's over

I currently live with my ex-boyfriend and we're both actively looking for a new place to live...apart. We're still civil with each other, engaging in small talk just to keep the akwardness at bay. I locked myself out so I called him to see if I can use his key to get in. He gives me his keys, and I go to put them away in his bag. Low and behold, there they were, a brand new pack of condoms in his bag. I mean seriously! It's one thing for me to do it, something else for me to definitely know he's hooking up with someone else. Ignorance is bliss...dam reality. So I freak out and he's trying to calm me down, telling me nothing happened. I'm no saint, but to have it in front of my face, starring at me is devastating. Anyhoo, I realize I need to step up my game. I need to be out there actively looking for something or someone else to keep me busy. I can't believe this is happening to me. I can't believe that 7.5 years of my life has all been for nothing. So what do I do? I schedule another date. So I'm going out with LAW again on sunday. He's so sweet. We're going to watch a movie. I'm also stressed out about the appartment search. It's always something. The appartment search is expensive, every application I turn in is 100+...only for them to tell me we need co-signers...urgh! I'm so stressed, so pissed, so everything. I need to get laid! Maybe I'll relax a bit. My co-worker tells me I should hook up with a random. He tells me not to ask the guy any questions about his life, last name, or family that way there are no emotional ties. I'm out on the prowl. Who's going to be Mr. Random?

Polish guy

I totally forgot to mention that he's very european down there. I guess, it's not common to get circumsized in europe. I haven't dated in my entire adult life...wondering if my bottom area is up to par with what's current in the market. I've heard about landing strips and going brazilian, but am scared to have some random person wax me in my most sensitive area....wonder what it would look like. Cousins are giving me some feed back on what's new and in. They also told me to buy a Rabbit?! Not sure if I want some contraption between my legs. I'd rather have the real thing. It looks really akward. I guess this is more girl talk than anything...we'll see where I go with this . XOXO

Update

Polish guy calls me last night...finally thank god! We talk about nonsense, just glad were talking. He's asking me why I'm dating him. He says "I don't own my own place, I barely make a decent salary, and I'm pretty average" got me thinking, why am I dating this guy? He's a sweet guy, great sex, and maybe I just like having someone there...a safetynet sortaspeak. So guy number 5: lets call him Law. Law isn't from the city, originally from the midwest. made plans to see each other later tonight...hoping he's hot. We're meeting up somewhere in SOHO. He's 5'10'', light brown hair, a man of the law, and 30+. I also got an email last night from guy number 5: he wants to meet up for pinkberry...aww how sweet. Why can't I just meet the man of my dreams, tall 6'0''+, very well groomed, great taste in clothing, cultured, melow, ambitious, loyal, and sweet? I'm not asking for much, where is he?

Finding Mr. Right

I recently broke up with my bf of 7 years...to think...all that time wasted. Going through some emotional times. Lost 25 lbs in 3 wks, and am now dating. I'm going to talk about trying to find Mr. Right or dating Mr. Good Enough for Right Now guy. I recently joined a dating website and am going to express my real thoughts through this blog...no holding back. For the sake of being anonymous, ill call first guy Hampton. Hampton's pictures look okay, a little blurry but okay. Nice chiseled body, great tan and of course he's wearing a hat and sun glasses. Go out to meet him at mexican restaurant in nyc. Instead of meeting a hot guy, I get an old guy, all wrinkled and to top it off he's a lot shorter than expected. First thoughts? "oh great, he's old". He goes on and on about his business and all i'm thinking about is how i'm going to ditch this guy. Okay, so I was deceived. Second guy: Polish dude. Polish dude shows up and he gets a 7 out of 10. Fairly decent, 6'3'', nice eyes. We hit it off talking on the phone day in day out for two and a half weeks. We meet, kissed and say good bye. Second date with Polish dude we have sex...best sex of my life. I never knew it could be that good. But now all he does is text me. He can't pick up the phone and just call. I mean what the heck? He's making up excuses but keeping me hanging by a thread. I can't believe this guy. "Oh I work a lot" ... yeah right. Note to self...don't have sex on the second date...damit! Third guy: Web guy, pretty nice guy, older but nice. We'll keep him around for now. Four guy: Mr. Finance...great first date...give him a 6 out of 10. Wondering where that's going to go. And now fifth guy: don't know what to call him yet. We'll see him tomorrow after work. Till then XOXO